There’s one thing that no one tells you about relationships when you’re young: being single can be intoxicating.
When you’re young, naive, and drunk on the concept of relationships and love, being single in your twenties and thirties may sound like a death sentence. There’s always been a certain societal pressure to get married and have children at a certain age, but as society slowly moves away from the concept of “barefoot and pregnant”, more and more women are celebrating their singleness (yeah!).
Now, as a single woman myself, it would be wrong to hand you a scrumptious looking slice of cake and not warn you that I forgot to add sugar to the recipe – being single is not always sweet. There have been plenty of moments filled with loneliness, frustration and rejection; but I’ve been able to learn from these emotions too. It hasn’t always been easy, but once I took a moment to step away from swiping right, I was able to enjoy sacred moments and achievements I don’t think I would’ve had if I was attached.
So without further ado, here are a few reasons I’ve found being single liberating, exhilarating, and eye-opening:
Travelling sans partner or friend is a liberating, yet daunting experience, but it’s one that every single woman should try at least once in their lives. I’ve had some of the most exhilarating experiences travelling on my own; falling in love with a Frenchman and meeting strangers that I now call my friends. Sure, you’ll have to invest in a selfie stick, but the rewards are worth it.
Japan, France, Italy and Indonesia are all great places to plan your next trip and are pretty safe for female solo travellers too. However, travelling abroad can’t always be included in everyone’s budget. If you can, take a walk on the wild side and head to a different city for the weekend! This is a great way to explore a new place without blowing your budget.
It’s odd to list loneliness as a reason to rejoice at being single, but it’s honestly a word that has too much of a negative connotation attached to it. As a single woman, I’ve learned to enjoy my own company when no one else wanted to. I’ve learned to step outside of my comfort zone and step into discomfort. I’ve learned to embrace the loneliness and realize that I didn’t die from it.
It’s not always easy to walk into a restaurant and enjoy a meal alone, but we should all learn to do this at some point. We all have to learn to enjoy our own company; otherwise, we might never learn to admire ourselves. “Sit through the lonely until you get to the good”.
Find someone who treats you the way you want to be treated. When you get your self-worth from someone else, you’ll become dependent on it and move from relationship to relationship. Again, not everyone is like this, but spending some time being single is a great way to re-evaluate how you value and treat yourself. Treat yourself like the goddess you are, so that when you finally find the partner who treats you as lovingly and gently as you’ve been treating yourself, “your heart will be able to recognize this person”.
If you’re like me and enjoy meditations, here are a few great guided meditations to help you with your self-worth:
- Linda Hall Mediation – Guided Meditation for Inner Peace and Self Worth
- Michelle Chalfant – 5 Minute Self Love Meditation
Related: 4 Ways To Have a Solo Night In
Indulge in a life-long passion project, or start a new hobby you’ve been dying to try, whatever you choose to do, just have fun with it! Hopefully, you have plenty of time on your hands to invest in yourself, so make sure that you do something that adds value to this season of your life.
I’ve always wanted to learn how to cook (I’m horrible in the kitchen), so along with a few cooking classes hosted around my city, I’ve spent plenty of time trying to channel my inner Martha Stewart.
Explore Your Body:
You’re a priceless gem that cannot be bought. You are a goddess in human form, an irresistible mystery waiting to be unwrapped. This season in your life is about finding your authentic self and cutting through the unworthiness that you might feel. If there’s nothing to give of yourself, how do you expect to give in a relationship? Explore all that sets your heart ablaze – your passions and desires. Learn to express yourself sexually, lovingly and set healthy boundaries that allow you to explore what turns you on.
Don’t be afraid to engage in self-pleasure and explore what you like and don’t like. This is the perfect time to learn to accept yourself – the good, the bad and the ugly.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Obviously, this is not meant to be a rant about how being single is great, and being in a relationship sucks. Instead, it’s meant to show you that being single has it’s benefits while you’re working on yourself and waiting for the “one”. Let me know in the comments what you think!